Minimize the noise by teaching your child not to yell.
The preschool years are busy ones for a young child. With an explosion of verbal skills, physical growth and physical achievements, preschoolers are expanding their world at a rapid pace. With these new skills, preschoolers often have trouble controlling emotions and dealing with frustration. Deal with a yelling preschooler with stable and consistent parenting. When a child has the security of supportive and clear expectations, the child will thrive.
1Set clear ground rules with your child so she understands your expectations. For example, if you decide that you will not tolerate loud yelling in the house – even if it's playing and not misbehavior – teach your child the difference between an “indoor voice” and an “outdoor voice.” With consistent reminders and expectations, your child will eventually learn that you do not want any type of yelling in the house.
2Remain calm when your child yells and respond without emotion. Do not respond to your child’s yelling with your own yelling – this sets the wrong example. Instead, lead your child to refrain from yelling by responding to him in a calm and even voice. For example, you might say, “Michael, I hear that you’re excited about playing hide and seek, but I need you to use your indoor voice inside the house.
3Respond to your child’s anger or frustration by acknowledging her feelings and showing her how to express the anger in an acceptable manner. Examples of acceptable anger expression for a preschooler include using simple words, banging on a drum, expending positive energy outside and drawing a picture. Tell your preschooler that it’s okay to feel angry, but that you want her to talk about angry feelings without yelling.
4Get down on your child’s level, establish clear eye contact and ask him to try speaking to you again without yelling. You could tell your child that yelling hurts your ears and your feelings and that you can hear him better when he doesn’t yell. Promise your child that you will listen when she speaks without yelling.
5Keep your promise so your child trusts that you will do what you say you will do. After your child speaks without yelling, help her resolve the frustration or anger in a positive way. For example, if she is frustrated because it’s time to pick up toys, show empathy but insist on compliance. You might say, “I hear that you don’t want to stop playing yet. We need to clean up so that we can run to the store, though. Let’s pick up your blocks together and you can take your doll with us to the store. When we get home, we’ll read a book.”
- Consistency is the key to teaching a preschooler the behavior you expect. While some children may tend to be louder than others – both in play and when acting out – with time and effort, your child can learn to adhere to your expectations.